Le Nerd

Apr 22

I continue to try to be a sitcom heroine

Did i fall over in the locker room at the gym because i was alone and fake stripping, and i got trapped in my pants? Yes, i did.
Am i currently wearing my very short bathing suit shorts to a restaurant because i’m too lazy to put on separate underwear and pants again? Yes, i am.

Obviously, i’m doing really well at being a grown-up today.

Apr 20

You know how i know im drunk?

Because i just listened to “indie rock and roll” by the killers and cried. Also i have a ton of homework that im muddling through, thinking about my youth, and waiting for mcdonalds delivery to arrive.

Apr 19

I don’t know why i try to shop at H&M

Every time, i am fat-shamed in the fitting room and reminded that their clothes are for tall, thin Swedes, not short, stubby, Hobbit-adjacent me.

Mar 14

I have so much homework to do today

But i’m probably going to watch tv and sleep instead.

Jan 23

I hate everyone except my dogs

Jan 07
Please Help!!

Please Help!!

Dec 14

Tumblr, im drunk and i hate racism. That is all.

Dec 02

My mom doesn’t know what a bedazzler is

And now im wondering what vagina i fell out of

Dec 01

I just licked kimchi off my phone screen. This is what paper writing all weekend does to me.

Nov 26

Jesus give me strength to focus. Also give me peanut butter and jelly.